One of my earliest memories is of when I was around 3 years old. My mom and I were getting onto a bus together; I had my Raggedy Ann doll with me. I'm not sure why, but I was mad or upset about something. I don't recall what about exactly, but I do remember wanting to throw my doll down. I threw the Raggedy Ann doll onto the bus seat, testing in a way, to see what my mom would do or how she would react. I think I recall my Dad raising his voice to her and she would never stand up for herself, and I would wonder why does she just let him mistreat her that way. So, after I threw that doll, all my mom told me was to go pick it up. That's it. She showed no anger, no mean words; only an instruction to me, to get it and maybe to sit down.
Another early memory I have is my 5th or 6th year birthday. My mom asked me what kind of cake did I want? I was into Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs at that time, so I told her that's the cake I wanted. And, I got it! My next door neighbor babysitter came to the party. She got me the game called "Sorry". Someone else gave me a gumball machine! They sang happy birthday to me. We played musical chairs. And we also played pin the tail on the donkey game. I'm not sure who the other kids were. But, it was a day that made me feel special and loved as my birthday was celebrated.
In reality, however, I did not get a birthday celebration every year. In fact, I can only recall on my hand the number of celebrations for my birthday. I think in 4th grade or maybe 6th grade I was allowed a girls sleepover birthday party, and that time or another time my parents took us to the movies. I think we might have watched "Broomsticks and Candlesticks" but I don't remember very clearly.
For my 16th birthday, my mom took me to Farrel's Ice Cream Parlour, and invited a half dozen or dozen friends also. No one came! I take that back. One girl came, who was new in town. Other than that one girl, who probably thought how strange and sad no one came to my birthday party at Farrels!
For my 18th birthday, I asked my parents for a home party, and they said yes. This time, I invited everyone. Family, and I had met a bunch of new friends at school from a student led Bible Study in high school. They all came! The house was full. There might have been beers and what-not for the adults. But, my friends and I stuck with soda. One of the Bible study leaders pulled me aside and said there shouldn't be any drinking (alcohol) there, or something to that effect. I didn't have any answer for him. I was just glad everyone was there, having a good time, and getting celebrated for my birthday.
And, a dear friend let me celebrate birthday number 25 with a bunch of friends from college. And, that was a special time for me. We had around 25-30 young people, mostly from our Inter-Varsity Christian Fellowship club on campus there. It rained hard that night, and people still came out. It was fun. We might have prayed and sang worship songs. There was a lot of food. I don't recall all of it. But, it was special time for me because I usually did not get celebrated on my birthday.
The Bible teaches that all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. When we do not forgive someone from our heart, it is possible for a root of bitterness to seep into our lives, leading us down a dark pathway. Well, this is what happened in my life. In my early 20s, I deeply loved someone and it seemed like we would marry someday. We talked or met at least 2-3 times a week together, at church, in youth group, or as friends. However, he did not have the same feelings for me as what I had had for him. I became deeply hurt. Rather than letting it go, however, the hurt remained. And, instead of taking it to Jesus, at the time, I just let the wound fester so to speak. And, that wound didn't heal properly.
And, I made poor decisions afterwards, not realizing at the time whether or not they were connected. But these words from the New Testament, "he brought me out of darkness and into his glorious light" became true for me. I chose to believe God's truth and God's goodness, that Christ died even for me and for my sin. The precious blood of Jesus Christ is what cleanses me from sin.
I do not recall the exact age, but I participated in a correspondence Bible study for kids. I might have been around 13 or 14, or maybe a tad bit older like 16-17. But, that mail-in Bible study taught me a lot! Each "lesson" had a Bible passage or series of passages to read, along with questions to answer on the text. I was led to learn about the problem of original sin from Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. I learned that the penalty of sin would be death. The good news is that God provided an escape from eternal death through Jesus Christ. I also remembering learning (for the 1st time) that "as far as the east is from the west is how far he has removed my transgression from me" and also, "God's word will not return to him void".
So, today through this blog, I am trying to share what Jesus has done for me. Jesus forgave me of all my sins. Jesus, for the joy set before him, endured the cross. God loved me so much that he gave his only son Jesus Christ to die in my place to pay for my sin's penalty of death. Wow. What love. Wow, what sacrifice. Wow, what an amazing God.
Today I am learning and growing in my faith and in the word of God. I am currently undergoing a 90 day reading challenge through the New Testament, getting the word of God into me again, afresh and anew. Today I read how the apostle Paul preached the kingdom of God boldly and welcomed all who came to him (see Acts 28:30-31). Whatever else God expects of me, I am open to learning and correction. I want to be a vessel for noble purposes. I want to live according to his ways. There are changes in my life that I might have to make, also.
I share a part of my story (testimony) today in hopes of a few things. One, if you're a believer, maybe my story will encourage you in the faith. Two, if you're not a believer in Jesus Christ, maybe my story will open your eyes to your own need of Jesus Christ and maybe you will turn to Jesus Christ and repent from sin. Yes, wherever you find yourself on the spectrum of faith today, from hot faith to no faith, I hope that maybe God would use my story today to bring you one step closer to him today. May God fill your heart with hope; may God fill your heart with faith. May we all agree that none, not one is righteous in God's eyes. We all need Jesus Christ today. We all need to surrender our lives over to his care and his authority today. If you're reading this and you have not yet done so I hope that you would give your heart and life to Christ today.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story today. May Jesus Christ richly bless anyone reading this now.
